so fresh and so clean, clean

sitting on my freshly made bed
with the windows wide open,
sunshine and breezes floating in.
I can actually see the carpeted floor
and the laundry basket
holds its tired arms
empty.
I am discovering that my heart
has changed
from the lazy bride i once was,
the girl who slept till 2 pm,
just in time to roll out of bed for work.
one who despised cleaning
and didn't mind the chaos.
With His pruning,
and plenty of grace,
i see that this is no longer the case.
I spend copious amounts
of time inside the home,
i keep company with children.
I have to actually get out of bed
to feed them breakfast
and i don't take 45 minute showers anymore.
But i am realizing my life is
much more joy filled than it has ever been.
I find rest in the simplicity of life
in spending time watching my son
draw three crooked crosses
and tickling my daughter.
I find a sense of purpose
and accomplishment
when I get the whole kitchen cleaned
and scrub the bathroom white again.
I will admit that is nowhere near
where I would have stumbled upon joy
5 years ago.
Marriage has always been fun,
and it has only become richer,
but I had no idea how to keep up an apartment,
let alone a home,
nor did i even have desire.
Pridefully, i thought
i was just gonna be a trophy wife.
just gets to go out to eat all the time
and thought we could just hire a housemaid to do all the cleaning.
hahaha..
i am the house maid.
and I don't mind.
I am not saying that it is effortless,
or that I just sing like a canary
when the dust needs scraping off
or the stove needs to be decrudded.
I just am so thankful that Jesus has given my heart
a transformation from laziness and entitlement
to one of gratitude and calling.
He has given me this home.
He has given me a husband and children to love and care for.
He has given me ownership
and an ability to manage what I have been entrusted to.
He has opened my eyes to the treasures
that lay quietly behind our front door.
I know I would not be able to walk in this place of rest
if not for His movement.
My bathroom, kitchen, and bedroom
are all restored back to order,
[at least today]
by the work of my humble hands,
and rest and
contentment
dwell here.