6 years.

it will be 6 years this saturday, 
that we've made it this far.
I can only walk in humble gratitude
and with the knowledge
that it has never been anything in me
but in Him
that we stand in strength today.
I look at Nathan and I am so so
made small in the fact that Jesus 
hand crafted
this gentle, beautiful man
specifically for me.
No one has ever dealt with me with such
a grand love as him.
To be patient when i am slow [and i mean molasses slow]
to keep silent when i fail [and he could say plenty]
and to hold tightly when i 
need to be held on tightly to.
Jesus knew i would need a man with
a gracious and humble heart
one that was quick to forgive, 
quick to serve
and slow to become angry.
Jesus knew i was much more tender than most
so he created Nathan to learn the
cotton ball language
so we could speak the same tongue.
Jesus gave me a man that takes the time 
to pursue me, 
water me, 
and harvest me,
and in this, 
I see what an incredible love my Father, 
my Groom has for me, 
in how intimately He knows me
the very inner of hearts
and I feel His vast love
tucked inside my marriage.
Our marriage has only grown
deeper, richer, 
thriving and is taking root
to such great depths.
we've seen festering wounds, 
destruction
and have been racked by 
flesh eating rot.
We have experienced death, 
barren bank accounts
and times of plenty and in want.
We've looked at pain, suffering,
infidelity and pride,
and yet God, our God in his might,
still breathes life in our marriage
and joy is found.
We have learned that joy and peace 
are found
in humble hearts,
in softened answers
with broken spirits.
We love not that we should in turn
deserve love [who deserves anything?]
but because He first loved us
and commanded us to love one another.
We have removed the spirit of entitlement,
of you-shoulds and why-don't-yous
and instead have replaced them with
how may i serve and I love you no matter what.
Jesus, you have been so good to us.
How we love you and praise you
for what You have done and are still doing
in the lives of two small crooked little people.
the one with the red curls 
and the one with the brown skin,
you have made us new.
we love you so much 
and thank you for 6 years of marriage.
what a gift.