the pack.

she was loud and obtrusive
her whole body screamed
with this restless desperation.
Her voice carried rather far
so more than one person could hear her
at any given time.
It was painful to watch,
as she clamored for attention,
any kind really.
She spoke eloquently
of herself
and never paused to ask a question
or find beauty past her own fingertips.
It's hard to stand in the shadow of someone like that
to watch as they glitter and glint
like glass
but the thing about glass 
it can shatter.
Wise husband blessed me with his hands,
his eyes, his prayers.
he whispered softly,
"just be close to Christ's heart"
as I walked out the door.
I was wary that I would find this
in a group of powerhouse women,
it's easy to feel small, 
lost in the shuffle,
forgotten.
But this is where smallness and humility meet.
I want to hold her hand tightly, 
as she helps me navigate 
these sharp tongues, 
these attempts to prove something,
anything to set themselves apart from the rest.
sigh. 
I don't hold myself in any higher regard than these women,
i wore those very same shoes many times in my life.
But I have found there is more peace,
more rest in quiet humility,
than swimming around in shark infested waters.
I have found there is more depth in pursuing maybe
one or two at a time,
giving them my undivided attention
than trying to compete with the masses.
And He reminded me that the humbled will be exalted.
Lord, always keep me small and joyful for you.
Keep my eyes on you and
to not compare my grass
to others yards.
You have already filled my garden up
with so many flowers
and only i can smell their fragrance.